March. My 15th month on the road. I didn’t quite do it like Jack Kerouac, but damn, I made a good run of it for sure! It was (is) tempting to keep going—run off to foreign lands on my time off to visit the beautiful strangers that I met along the way, or meet new ones—yet my feet are craving the earth, and in that earth, roots. That doesn’t mean that my wanderlust will magically disappear, or that I won’t have the nights alone wishing I were on Barbados drinking with a table full of men doting on me in the warm night air…mmm. Ok, wait, back to the present! Roots. Yes. I am very much looking forward to doing something I’ve never done before, to see what I get that I’ve never gotten before. People always say I’m so brave for living the life I’ve lived, but the funny thing is, planting myself with a house and property in the middle of a beautiful Southwestern town is probably the bravest thing I’ve ever done. A friend asked me yesterday if I was feeling anxious or nervous about it. With all honesty and complete calm I said no. “Actually, I’m more calm and excited than I’ve felt in a long time.” I think part of it is that I am realizing with more conviction just how powerful my thoughts are in bringing me to the places I imagined, so I worry less about where I am going. I know what’s coming—because I have created and believed it and felt it and know it exists already. Each time I see my thoughts materialize, I have more faith in the next ones, and it charges me up.
As I write this, I suddenly have a terrified feeling of publishing these words, imagining people out there—my friends, strangers, coworkers—saying to themselves, “Oh my God what has she been smoking out there in her tent this year!” But then I think of my many self-helpery mentors out there who I’ve listened to all year and beg me not to give into fear of excuses or intimidation, and be who I am. So, yeah, Ok I guess I’ll just speak my truth and not worry about being perceived as too woo-woo (a word I taught my dear friends in Tucson who now think it’s the coolest word on the planet!)
I could go into all of the magic that has happened to me this year, but I’m saving it all up for a book or a (different kind of) blog, or a speech, or just something where I can compile them all into neat categories with great stories to match. So, stay tuned…
For now, what I’d really love to do is make a list of numbers and facts that these past 15 months has brought: How many miles did I drive? (around 13,000?) How many National Parks? (8) What was the longest road trip I made? (SF to Vegas) ...and then there’s the fun stuff like: How many lips did I kiss? How many other people were ever in my tent? (Just One…) How many times did I rollerblade? How many trips to Value Village did I make? And, I want to make top 3 highlights from each month: D20! Tony TNT! Bacon Saves! Jim the Cowboy!
Thank you for all the memories—the morning chills, the hot springs, the love ache, the heartbreak, the reunions, the new sparks, the soft sheets, the soft snow, the wet noses, the wet lips, the chills, the heat, the planes, the trains, and the automobiles.